Articles

Three Phases Of Communication

If you observed a complete communications event, you would notice three distinct phases:

• Conversatiion for Relationship: done with the intention to build connection, context and intimacy for conversation. Enables the ability to speak to another's listening.

• Conversatiion for Possibility: done with the intent to explore options and possibilities. Requires listening for what is missing and articulation of new options, opportunities and potential.

• Conversatiion for Action: done with the intention to coordinate action, complete tasks, projects and accomplish goals. Requires making clear requests and promises and articulating conditions of satisfaction (what, by when, by whom and how).

Since the communications process of our day has little use for the competence of listening deeply, most communications events have devolved into subtle or overt bouts that only serve the purpose of getting what we believe we want, need or deserve. Since little room has been left for the art of listening, the communicatons process, as it is largely practiced today, skips the first two phases of conversation with most of the emphasis placed on the third.

It is for this reason, coupled with the stress of today's world, that most of the energy inherent in conversaton goes to obtaining the committment for the action we want. This is not communications, as it is devoid of deep listening, which deprives both parties of hearing, learning and being transformed by something new.

Components of Complete Communications Event

• A good mix of the three
• A natural progression from relationship >>> possibility >>> action
• The greater the stakes the more important the progression becomes
• Everyone is having the same type of conversation at the same time
• All parties are competent in each type of conversation